Hey, the name is Loco (not really) and I’m here in Yokohama, Japan (really).
I’m an aspiring writer, live from NYC (Brooklyn, where u at?) and doing a bid in Japan -6 years running. Sorry but some of the posts are a little lengthy so if you’re pressed for time or have a short-attention span…
…hell, what was I saying?
Oh yeah… this is not your typical blog about the foreigner’s experience here and no I’m not in my Mom’s basement…anymore. I’m in Asia! And I haven’t even seen a basement in 6 years (-;
Of course, all comments are welcomed and encouraged. Go ahead, send some or love or tear me a new one. It’s all good. Comments keep me motivated and the juices flowing…I try to respond to everyone. Just don’t get too carried away. I endeavor to post regularly but might miss a day or two, or seven, every so often…gotta get outta this basement Internet Cafe sometimes so that I have something to write about, you know? (-;
WARNING: Some of the material is explicit (yes I use expletives sometimes gratuitously…you know, for effect…but I don’t do porn, sorry, wrong site) so you should watch your ears cuz sometimes I don’t watch my mouth.
はじめましてよろしくおね願いいたします Hajimemashite yoroshiku onegai itashimasu.
Translation: It’s an honor to make your acquaintance and I’d appreciate it if you showed me some love and kept me in your good graces (or something to that effect)
(-:
Loco
PS: Yes, I speak passable Japanese…okay maybe not passable, but I can get by.
PPS: I’ve also written, and am in the process of revising, a novel. It’s TOTALLY unrelated to my experiences in Japan. If you enjoy my writing and have a little free time please check out: Real Gods require Blood. I’ll be posting it here chapter by chapter.

I’m excited, bring it on!
Hi Amy! Thanks for the reply!
Well, that’s the plan! Stay excited and keep coming. I’ll try not to let you down
(-:
just found your blog, bring it!
I’m passing the word.
Thanks Zen, consider it brung (-:
Welp, since Az-sensei has become a married salaryman with no time to post, It’ll be nice to see the views of another kokujin.
Loco! I have been a fan of your writing ever since 2003 when you informed me that there was such a thing as a weblog. Rock on!!! Stay LOCO!
S
Glad you could make it! Cool Moniker (Itainteazy)
Oh yeah, I messed up the embed it in the name (http://www.gaijinsmash.net) It’s a dude by the name of Jeff Windham, who was a ALT like you (I know, assistant my ass), but got stuck in the boonies around Osaka. I guarantee you that if every single entry made me roll on the floor gasping for breath, they will just kill you ten times over since you had to actually live through pretty much the same shit. BTW, thanx for the compliment on my moniker!
thanks again Itainteazy, good looking out!
So glad I came across your blog. A change from some of the happy-go-lucky ones I’ve been reading. Looking forward to more posts!
Thanks Raven! Glad you’re diggin it. Please keep on coming through. Yep, ain’t nothing happy go lucky this way. But I’ll try to keep my anger and cynicism entertaining…best I can do to maintain up in this piece. Ain’t nothing worse than reading a bunch of complaints from whining-ass gaijin (-:
Glad to see you online sharing your experiences in Japan!
Zurui
Black Tokyo
Thanks Zurui! Drop in anytime! And tell a friend ne (-;
loco
awesome =) i was thinking about teaching in japan too!
Thank you for your insite. I will be looking forward to reading your blog. I’m an Black woman living in Alabama USA with a deep if not unnatural love for Japan, even though I’ve never been. Hearing about your experiences is very appreciated. I would like to some day visit and it’s nice to know some of the things I can expect to find.
Domo arigato!
Ree
Thanks Ree and Ilana for responding (-:
dou itashimashite (-:
loco
Loco,
Just read “an empty seat…” and “a little about me…”. Keep it going! You
captured some of my own feelings exactly.
Thanks for the shout Andy. ganbarimasuyo (-: please keep reading and commenting if you have time
Loco
Damn,
Just read through your blog in one go and what a blast.
I wonder what they fink bout a Dutch born Chinese, since i’m going to Japan in April for a year to study and for an internship.
Keep up the work and stay sane.
Hey Loco, been keeping up with your blog ever since I found it on Japundit.com. You’ve made my blog list. I look forward to more post as my interest for Japan grows. I’m diggin the “10 ways NOT to go loco in Yokohama” set. Hope to make it out there next summer! Take care and keep it real like you do!
God bless!
Thanks James! I’m diggin writing it too. It’s cathartic. Shout out any time. And thanks for the add (-:
Loco
Hey Loco – WOW – I just looked at your pictures on how to survive number 7 – amazing – you better watch out or you are going to get me excited about moving to India and seeing the sights outside of the good ole USA. Thanks for sharing!
hey reason2:
you’re welcome. I’m sure India will be awesome too (-:
Loco
Hi loco!
i just moved to japan a few days ago to stay here for 3 months with my girlfriend who is Japanese.
She was telling me all about enka and that there was even a black guy who sings it. Neway last night he was on tv and I thought ..wtf ? this is weird. The worlds first black enka singer. So I looked him up on the internet and somehow I ended up at your blog. I read a few of your posts and boy i love it. Your writing is soooo funny/interesting/fresh and at times painful (in a good way). I love japan and really know nothing about it. I learn so much every time I have read something from your blog. It such a treat to learn in detail about something so specific and unknown as what it would be like being a black man living in tokyo. I have only just started reading but I am hooked.
You seemed to have developled an amazign abilty of reading peoples minds its very hillariose and I can relate to the stuff you say, you seem so good at reading people.
though I think you think wayyyy to much and you really shouldn’t try to get into peoples head so much. You may be right with what your saying but even so I would prefer to not know…
What I mean is If you dont know someone is thinking badly of you then you can be more friendly to them. Truth is yes,our life is full of problems and always will be , people will think all kinds of bad things about us and most of it we will never know(thank god) ….If we knew all the shit people(loved ones included) have thought about us and said behind our backs we would probably all hate each other. I think its our job to not fill our minds with the poor things people think of us and actually make an effort to forgive them…truth is like you said they dont actually know you. In a world with more problems each day and shit plasted all over the news and the internet its becoming more important for us to dwell on the good if at least for our own sanity. In most cases the negative stuff we think about is not actually helping us but the problem is we think it is, we think we have to think about these problems so we can solve them or whatever..I dont know it just seems human nature to latch onto the negative and blind ourselves to the positive.
neway I hope I didnt crap in your ear too much I just feel sorry for you when I read some of this stuff I hope that this problem can dissolve. but most of all thankyou for the great writing!!!!! I will show my friends!
Luke
Hey Luke, Thanks for the thoughtful response…(-:
The tortured wannabe artist, I’m such a fucking cliche…anyway, I’m a work in progress, thanks for the kind words, and I agree with you: thinking for people, and dwelling on what negativity they may or may not be harboring is indeed not healthy. And I should focus more on positive things (which I have been trying to do. But the negative also makes for interesting writing and from what you said interesting reading so I guess I’m stuck in a hole (MJG knows what I’m talking about) like the caterpillar man. But, I guess I kinda like it down here…torture suits me…I appreciate your sympathy and concern, but please don’t feel sorry for me. And holla anytime! I love thoughtful readers…you guys are the sunshine.
Loco
I should have probably made it clear that even though I was talking about thinking positive I don’t feel that you are a negative person nor do I feel this is a negative website. In fact it makes me laugh!! and it seems even when you are talking about negative stuff it is in the spirit of entertaining others and humour …I am not 100% about my motives for my previous comment maybe because today I was feeling a bit down and I was talking more to myself…you know. ne way I have been refreshing 4 times today for a new post!
Well, entertainment, in every sense of the word, is my goal so thanks again! And don’t sweat it! In my efforts to achieve balance in my writing I’ve been known to go either direction a little too far so depending on which post you read you might feel I’m decidedly either or.
Sorry about the delay on the new post. It’s proving to be a challenge and a half…Ironically it’s about patience and the need for it. I’ll get it up asap. Probably tomorrow though so you can refresh then (-:
Loco
It seems most people didn’t get past the discrimination on the train thing. Too bad, that part is pretty boring. If you made it past the boring part you got to the funniest part of this post, the lustful encounter with the “Pinky Girl” and the reminiscing about an encounter with another similar girl. Freaking hilarious.
I for one got past that bit and read the whole thing..and you’re right the part after is really funny but unlike you I also loved the start.
Luke-san, thanks again for the shout and the kind words (-:
Loco
Oh shit, forgot to shout at you Cryptnotic!!! Hope you didn’t take it personally! Glad you enjoyed the portion you enjoyed, and hope you’re digging the rest of the site as well…thanks for giving it to me straight. I can take it! (-:
Loco desu
Hey Loco ,
First of all, condolence fore your loss…
Seconde:
This is really not normal …..’ve read your entire BLOG in 1 week… one word exquisite …. My God … I don’t even have to go to Japan .. you tell stories so clearly that I am sitting next to you… how longer the stories how these more interesting they are. (please keep it Up )
i love it how you tell it from yours (”as a Black Man’s) perspective ..(I myself am a Somalian guy how life’s in Holland ( i’mfrome the Northe side , my home town used to be hargeisa by the way
it’s allmost three in the morning and need to go to work soon…( I had to much Red Bull) end my English is Fucked-Up i know.
But!
I love youre style the more intelligent way of telling ..instead of the Whole Disney blablabla happening in Japan ……I was always looking fore this kind of blog .At last ….somme on ” Keeping it Real” ….Please (feed my need) give us a nieuwe Update
A real big Fan frome Holland.
Mazzel (means later ore Bey in Dutch)
Mazzel-san (-: High Praise, indeed! Thank you so much for your kind words…
It gratifies me to hear from readers whether they like it or not. At least I know my writing was significant enough to provoke a response. And don’t worry about the English. I understood you loud and clear! (-: I will indeed endeavor to keep it up!
Thanks again,
Loco
This country can’t stay as closed as it is now, forever. Whether that’s a good thing or not is irrelevant; By forcing them to deal with you and acknowledge their own fears and eventually (hopefully) accept that you, or any other foreigner, is not a demonic creature sent from the underworld to tear apart their lives, you’re actually helping them.
At least, I like to think so…
If I’m wrong, at least I can enjoy watching the most pitiful of fuckers squirm.
Strong language Billy-san…I like to think so too…
But, I do have a sadistic streak I need to be mindful of though (-:
Thanks as always for the shout
Loco
Love the blog!….and I love Japan – went there once for two weeks and would happily have stayed for 2 decades! …..if I was stinking rich….it cost me a fortune!
Tokyo was incredible and so was Osaka at night from the Skytower
Sophie x
Thanks Sophie for the shout! Yeah, Japan is awesome…
I like that “Stinking rich” part (-; Yes, I want to have the stench of money too LMAO
Loco
I’ve only read #9 about patience, and wow, very interesting, informative, and look very much forward to reading your other posts. Though I don’t like or use profanity, what you have to say definitely holds my attention. I like when people are “on the real” and not just giving me stories of life through “rose colored glasses”, if you know what I mean. So, though I’ve just read this one entry, thinking there’s some great things to come, especially since the above commentors say it is so. (-.^) I really would love to move to Japan and live there for a few years, but alas, don’t think it’ll happen. I should be able to visit for a little while though in the not too too distant future ie: a couple years from now I hope.
I’ve read some of the other bloggers out there, and I once did run across a womans blog where she was being quite real herself and..dare I say cheeky..ha, was a bit much, but still informtive n strayed from the norm.
So keep it up..
Ganbatte ne.
GRR!!! Had this semi long comment typed up and I got an error message! So, this is a much shortened version and condensed of what I said before. But here goes it: I’ve only read #9 just now after searching goggle for the phrase “patience is a virtue” in japanese. Ha, what a site to come to. So far, so interesting, and informative, lok foward for sure to reading more. Though I don’t like or use profanity, i’ll “grin and bare it” another expression for ya (-.^) because you keep my attention rapt. I like that you’re on the real and not all happy happy joy joy..like I said only read this intro and one post, so we’ll see as I go, but think i’ll learn a lot and enjoy as I see others obviosuly have and do. Thanks for sharing your experiences, I would love to move to Japan and live there for a few years, but since I sincerely doubt this’ll happen, I hope in the not too to distant future i’ll be able to visit for a little while, like the next couple years. Anyway I enjoy that you don’t do brevity well , for I don’t either, though, I think I need to work on being thorough and alla that.. also! I have read snippets of others’ blogs in Japan, and I found one quote interesting one that was not all happy go lucky and was, dare I say, cheeky..hah, was a little rough for me..she liked to swear more than you, from what I can tell..and few other things, point is, good to see few different sides to the “gaijin” thing. So this ended up being, not shorter than my last attempt, but, oh well.
Keep it up.
Gabnatte ne!
Post Scriptum: love the loco in yoko rhyme there!
Hows the escorts service in Yoko, Loko?
couldn’t tell you Noz, I’ve never gone the direct pay for play route here. But if i do I’ll let you know the price and if it’s worth it. I hear it’s astronomical though….and probably not worth it
Dear Loco様
I’m sorry to contact you suddenly but I found your expat blog and am contacting you on behalf of our website ModernNipponProject.com
We are planning to renew our site and make it into a more advanced information platform for Japanese and foreigners coming to or living in Japan, to exchange useful information or find other people with the same experience in their area (since it is especially difficult for foreign residents who do not live in the big cities) and introduce the town they live in, its best spots and foods, post photos and articles.
We are looking for foreign residents in ALL Japanese prefectures and would love to hear their experiences and share them with others on our new interactive website, and we hope helpful and interesting discussions will come up in the course.
Maybe you would like to contribute a blog entry you wrote in the past, if the interactive concept is not your type. ANY sort of contribution or interaction would be greatly appreciated and we would be very grateful.
Our current site is not being updated while we are still in preparations for the brand new interactive information platform, but please do have a look and if you are interested in any of the ideas above, please do let us know and write us back.
We hope we can gather a lot of people and create cultural interaction on the new Modern Nippon Project site.
Thanks for reading and hoping to hear from you soon!
Yours kindly,
the members of the MNP team
http://modernnipponproject.com/en/
Thanks for stopping by TGH!
Definitely looking forward to reading your lengthy posts!
LOL @ ‘Happy-go-Lucky’ blogs! Sometimes I too catch myself saying “I love Japan” ,
but then Japan herself SMACKS me round the face and reminds me that FEELINGS AIN’T ALWAYS MUTUAL!
PEACE
excellent job. i enjoy your posts.
Yo G
Hit me back with your email address; I only have your cellphone addy.
Loco in Robohamayomama
Thanks for your comment. I never use that word. Never, but I was so disgusted and aggravated. I was told by a close friend to tone it down, so I used the slang and not the real word. Thanks again for the post.
After spending 2 weeks in Yokohama in 2007 for Worldcon, I want to return to see more of the city.
Anyway, keep up the good work!
Doin’ some “adjusting” to my Blogroll and found you via 7:10. Ima add you. I just got a School blog so no worries!! Good straight writing/thoughts!! Keep it up!!